Crucial Conversations

Meme stolen from Julie’s journal

1.Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 42.
3. Find the first full sentence.
4. Post the text of the next seven sentences in your journal along with these instructions.
5. Don't dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST.

When we (the authors) are in the middle of an on-site workshop and we suggest there are alternatives to Sucker’s Choices, someone invariably says: “Maybe you can speak honestly and still be heard in other organizations, but if you try it here, you’ll be eaten alive!” Or the flip side: “You’ve got to know when to fold if you want to survive here for another day.” Then in a hail of “I’ll say” and “Here, here!” many nod in agreement.

At first we thought that maybe there *were* places where dialogue couldn’t survive. But then we learned to ask, “Are you saying there isn’t *anyone* you know who is able to hold a high-risk conversation in a way that solves problems *and* builds relationship? There usually is.

Start with heart.


-from Crucial Conversations, Tools for Talking When The Stakes Are High